When the DJ is spinning your verse at bar mitzvahs, maybe you鈥檝e lost your shiznit edge.
Personally, I鈥檝e always thought of Drake as the Perry Como of rap: Snooze inducing.
The bar mitzvah angle came up last week in a New York federal courtroom, where the internecine diss-off between Drake and Kendrick Lamar has landed.
The 色色啦 rap superstar鈥檚 lawyer claimed that Lamar鈥檚 chart-topping song 鈥淣ot Like Us鈥欌櫬犫 indisputably a smackdown of Drake聽鈥 had 鈥渁chieved a cultural ubiquity unlike any other rap song in history,鈥欌 transformed into a 鈥渄e facto national anthem鈥欌 via its relentless promotion by Universal Music Group, the record label shared by Drake and Lamar.
The megahit seized the earwig attention of gazillions beyond the rap cognoscenti who didn鈥檛 know the backstory between these two hip-hop icons, had no grasp of lyric subtext and are unfamiliar with the ethos of rap beefs聽鈥 words and music to do cred feuding by.
鈥淲ho is the ordinary listener?鈥欌 Judge Jeannette Vargas asked. 鈥淚s it someone who鈥檚 going to catch all those references? There鈥檚 so much specialized and nuanced to these lyrics.鈥欌
Drake鈥檚 lawyer, Michael Gottlieb, posited that the average listener could be 鈥渁 13-year-old who鈥檚 dancing to the song at a bar mitzvah.鈥欌
Vargas, dryly: 鈥淭hat would be a very interesting bar mitzvah.鈥欌
Five-time Grammy winner Drake had one of those, actually.
The 鈥樷榥uances鈥欌 of 鈥淣ot Like Us鈥欌 are hardly hiding in the downbeat.
One of the biggest musical blockbusters of 2024聽鈥 earning record and song of the year Grammys, most Apple Music streams worldwide and at the taunting core of Lamar鈥檚 wildly entertaining Super Bowl halftime performance in February聽鈥 鈥淣ot Like Us鈥欌 is a multifront namecheck attack on Drake, branding him a 鈥渃olonizer鈥欌 who has appropriated rap culture. This bi-racial Jewish African-Canadian raised middle class in 色色啦聽鈥 by all metrics just about as far from the rap breeding ground of Compton, Calif. (Lamar鈥檚 birthplace) as it鈥檚 possible to get, thus 鈥淣ot Like Us,鈥欌 inauthentic聽鈥 whilst also smeared with sexual innuendo. To wit: 鈥淚 hear you like 鈥榚m young,鈥欌 an insinuation Drake has muscularly rejected.
(Speaking of muscular, have you seen pix and video Drake posted on Instagram a few days ago? Flashing shirtless sculpted torso, abs to die for, though some skeptical commentators have dismissed the images as deep fakes. But Drake has long-engaged his social media audience in his 鈥渇itness journey.鈥欌)
The trash-talking betwixt Drake and Lamar has been a lengthy saga, as well. The machine-gun impugning in 鈥淣ot Like Us鈥欌 was a takedown too far, however, by Drake鈥檚 reckoning.
Perhaps shrewdly, Drake hasn鈥檛 aimed the litigation at his rival聽鈥 which he can cover effectively with a rap rejoinder, in a wrangle that鈥檚 been going on for ages聽鈥 unleashing his legal cadre on record company UMG instead.
As reported by the Associated Press, Lamar鈥檚 smash insult track amounts to 鈥渇alsely accusing (Drake) of being a sex offender, engaging in pedophilic acts鈥欌 and endangered his safety by聽鈥 quoting the AP story here聽鈥斅 The civil suit blames 鈥淣ot Like Us鈥欌 not only for harming Drake鈥檚 image but for attempted break-ins at his home and the shooting of a security guard at Drake鈥檚 色色啦 mansion聽in May 2024.
Not an exaggerated risk, either. Two studies in the mid-‘80s concluded that murder was the cause of half of hip-hop musician deaths. 色色啦 rappers Jahvante Smart (stage name Smoke Dawg) and Dimarjio Jenkins (stage name Houdini) are among those shot and killed in recent years.
The “Not Like Us” cover art helpfully presented a bird鈥檚 eye view photo of Drake’s 色色啦 spread taken from a Google Maps screenshot, with 13 red markers placed on the house鈥檚 roof, mock-symbolizing the presence of registered sex offenders聽鈥 completely made-up stuff.
A guy who reportedly dropped $8 million on lost bets in June alone without blinking an eye can certainly afford to sic a passel of white-shoe lawyers on Universal. And wanting to crush the slander in those aforementioned imputations聽鈥 sex with minors聽鈥 is certainly understandable.
But does this duel to the rhyming death really belong in a courtroom? When does trash-talking become slander?
Their record label has countered that the lyrics are just hyperbole, continuation of tit-for-tat barbs that don鈥檛 rise to the legal threshold of defamation. 鈥淲hat you hear in these rap battles is trash-talking in the extreme,鈥欌 said label lawyer Rollin Ransom, 鈥渁nd it is not, and should not be treated as statements of fact.鈥欌
I don鈥檛 much like the idea of a courtroom turned into a mosh pit for lexicon and linguistics, with a judge weighing cutting wordplay.
On the other side of the world, police are now investigating as a potential hate crime the 鈥淒eath, death to the IDF鈥 (Israel Defense Forces) chant led on the Glastonbury musical festival stage last month by punk duo Bob Vylan, livestreamed by the BBC, which failed to interrupt the broadcast.
Well, they鈥檙e punkers and nobody expects subtlety from nihilist ranters, or even two brain cells that can be rubbed together for that matter from the undertalented descendants of The Sex Pistols, Ramones and Dead Kennedys.
It鈥檚 dangerous territory to be treading into as a matter of law, though, the licence of artists and the performance megaphone provided to them. Roger Waters, antisemite to the bone, has made a post-Pink Floyd career of it.
When Lamar stepped onto Drake turf for a couple of concerts at Rogers Centre last month, 鈥淣ot Like Us鈥欌 got a two-minute standing ovation.
Judge Vargas has yet to rule on Drake鈥檚 lawsuit. But the court of public opinion has already rendered its verdict.
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